Who are you?

I AM

Too Busy for Therapy

1/ Do it remotely. We can use Skype, Facetime, Whatsapp or a secure platform called : “On Call” that is PHIPA compliant if you have concerns about privacy and the internet or you have a medical information security concern.

Remote therapy can be highly effective although it is different from In-Person therapy.

It can be used

  • to adapt to vacations and travel, in the context of ongoing In-Person therapy,
  • to substitute at times when you have “the hour” but not the travel time to get to the hour and back.
  • to accommodate time of day and location scheduling issues – I work in different offices and sometimes your schedule and mine can work time-wise but the location doesn’t work.
  • to continue therapy when you move to another location.

 

Click here to complete form for Remote Therapy

 

  2/ Sometimes busy-ness is a result of poor time management, and that gets better with effective therapy.

Anxiety, Panic, Diversion, Focus and expenditure of time and energy on things that relieve distress or pain rather than on the things that are interesting to you sucks your time away from things that matter to you, and reduces your vitality. Changing this is an important goal of therapy for many people.

Doing just fine but my (wife/ husband/mother/partner/boss) wants me to get counselling or therapy

If you believe you are doing fine and someone important to you ( Friend, wife, husband, Sibling, parent , child, ,,, or the courts) wants you to get help, with many therapists you will be wasting your time and theirs in order to fulfil an obligation you have been put under.

You might as well come to somebody who understands how it feels to be misunderstood and pushed into things you don’t want to do. I am one of those people.

I feel sad or unhappy a lot

Here is the Becks depression scale that can be done all by yourself

(https://www.bmc.org/sites/default/files/For_Medical_Professionals/Pediatric_Resources/Pediatrics__MA_Center_for_Sudden_Infant_Death_Syndrome__SIDS_/Beck-Depression-Inventory-BDI.pdf

Some people use this to diagnose Depression.

Depression is hugely present in North American culture https://www.verywellmind.com/depression-statistics-everyone-should-know-4159056 about 15% of the population according to some sources will experience depression in their lifetime.

The “ Depression” label itself does not help much, and prescription of anti-depressants alone is disappointingly ineffective. Medication for Depression is seen by some as an epidemic in itself with serious consequences and side-effects.

At the same time, psychotherapy is sometimes more effective with the support of medications. I will work with your physician or psychiatrist to manage the pharmaceutical part of treatment if there is one.

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Therapy is a waste of time and money

I had 8 therapists work with me as a patient or client in my lifetime – I spent a total of over 2,000 hours and a whole lot of money. Two of them were mostly effective. 6 out of 8 were either mostly a waste of time and some small parts of the work worsened the situation of my life as a result of serious misattunement.
My track record of clients who start with me and quit because it’s not worthwhile is far better than that. 1 out of 8 or 10 clients don’t get what they want from me. Sometimes there is just not a good fit. It happens.

Here is a link to PPRNet ( Psychotherapy Practice Research Network )
http://www.med.uottawa.ca/pprnet/eng/index.html They publish research about what is effective in Psychotherapy Practice – it is generally not the modality ( Gestalt, EFT, CBT, Psychoanalysis DBT etc etc. ) but rather the therapist’s interpersonal skills, the client’s expectations and managing the therapeutic relationship that work.

I feel anxious or panicky sometimes.

A certain amount of anxiety serves as an impulse that leads to action. And when it gets to be constant, free-floating or high intensity, something is going on that can be dealt with.

Sometimes stress and anxiety can lead to physical symptoms and illness. Sometimes headaches, digestive distress, back pain, and other serious illnesses are related to anxiety . Sometimes it is the other way around.

There are complex diagnoses available for Social anxiety, General anxiety, Performance anxiety and so on. We can work with all of it, using a wide range of techniques and starting fundamentally from a Relational Gestalt Therapy approach.

It is against the regulations of my college to provide testimonials but I wish it wasn’t, because I have some really satisfying case histories involving physical illness and restrictions in the enjoyment of life. What counts is you, and I would like to work with you.

watch: kiss with a fist

My marriage relationship is not good

Click to watch videos below:

Kiss With A Fist

Shame

I am lonely

Relational Psychotherapy is all about loneliness, starting with actual connection and helping you develop skills and confidence to live with our essential human loneliness and to achieve deep contact with other people.

Click link below to watch video:

The Sound Of Silence

Say Something

I am an addict

  • Alcohol
  • Drugs — Coke… Heroin,,, social ,,, pot
  • Work, sex, Love
  • Cigarettes.

Addiction can be layered and sometimes the best you can do is to work with a 12 step program. We work differently – with the core that drives addiction.

Click to watch video below:

Lookin’ For Trouble

I am angry - or People tell me I am angry and I need help

Click to watch video below:

Top 10 Games With the Best Destruction

Anger is sometimes appropriate. Anger is often not appropriate and leads suffering, disconnection, loneliness and less vitality all around. When I feel sadness or fear that is unbearable, my anger helps me get through it. … for the moment at least.

I have suffered a loss

Click to watch video below:

Louis Armstrong

I have an eating disorder

Click to watch video below:

Scars To Your Beautiful

SEX … its painful/ I want more/ I want less/ I am bored / I cant connect it with intimacy / Porn beats real sex any day/ My partner cheated on me. / I cheated on my partner. / ……

Click to watch video below:

No Sex Marriage – Masturbation, Loneliness, Cheating and Shame 

Sex is so complex .. there is no general statement I can make here about it. We will work with in the place where you are to bring comfort, safety and vitality to your life – to disentangle shame, ignorance, anger, fear and help you find your own self.

I want TO BLOW SOMEBODY’S BRAINS OUT /hurt someone/

Click to watch video below:

Folsom Prison Blues

 

I saw God and I dont know how to handle it.

Hey, I saw God too.

I have a psychiatric diagnosis of Bipolar/ ADHD/ Schizophrenic/ Narcissistic or Borderline or Schizoid or other Personality Disorder / ( Axis 2?)

In 1973 I spent time at 999 Queen St in a ward where straight jackets had been replaced by psychopharmaceuticals – chemical straight jackets  … After many years , Gestalt Therapy has been proven effective in dealing with the most difficult of clients – and pharma has advanced to where collaboration between the approaches can help bring you a fuller life.

I was doing just fine until I got caught

We can talk ..

I’ve been to therapy before

Great, we have some “ stuff” to work with

I hear voices - channel spirits - see auras - talk to animals ( who talk back! )

Some people see and hear things that other people do not. You might be just fine and not know it, suffering as much from being misunderstood and shamed as from loneliness. Come to the party of respect for self and other.

I have been a shaman and an Anglican Deacon. I’ve done psychic readings and held conversations with animals and spirits. …. And lots of other stuff.

I am BORED

Liberate your ability to pay attention to what interests you . Liberate your ability to discover and know what interests you. Liberate your curiosity.

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